My honest opinions on "Happiness"

Some people in life just want to be "happy."

I've met rich people who are miserable, and I've met homeless people happier than most.

I've met people who are only happy when drunk or doing drugs,

and I've met people who feel as if only other people can make them happy,

like their pursuit of happiness will end with a relationship.

This sounds cheesy as fuck, but happiness comes from within.

ALL emotions are simply just chemical reactions in our brains.

Logically, our emotions are pointless, which is why lately I feel so apathetic towards everyone and everything, even if I am hurt or saddened, it's better to just stop caring about the pain. When you stop caring about everyone else and the world around you, somehow the world seems less scary. When you stop caring about happiness, ironically you will find some happiness in life.

People are not responsible for my emotions. I could go on for hours, days, even months talking about all the people who fucked me over and all the others I fucked over likewise. It doesn't matter who or what is to blame, because quite honestly it's too exhausting and tiring to waste my brain power being argumentative. Nobody should expect perfection from somebody else. Sometimes people do the right thing for the wrong reason, sometimes people do the wrong thing for the right reason, and sometimes the right and the wrong things are the same things.

This blog is a bit of a ramble, just random thoughts on my mind.

I became a philosopher and studied psychology to better understand the world.

All it's done is make me question everything twice as much.

Recovery Blog

Sadness gives depth. Happiness gives height. Sadness gives roots. Happiness gives branches. Happiness is like a tree going into the sky, and sadness is like the roots going down into the womb of the earth. Both are needed, and the higher a tree goes, the deeper it goes, simultaneously. The bigger the tree, the bigger will be its roots. In fact, it is always in proportion. That’s its balance.

This is something I found on an artist's page that really spoke with me.
In other news, I am attending A.A. again and taking the program seriously.
I only have 14 days sober of alcohol and hard drugs, I am currently working the steps.
Letting go of resentments and saying the serenity prayer helps with my resentments.
I am still a non-believer and skeptic of religion, however I am in recovery.

Fuck Humans, I'm a Fox now.

I'm a misanthrope, I have a general dislike for human nature and human society. When I think long and hard about my life, my past, everything that has happened whether it was inside or outside of my control, I've realized something: Humans are the cause of all my pain. Human beings, the most wicked and disgusting creatures on this planet, have caused me the most pain in the world. Animals have never hurt me, and sometimes I wonder if I am truly an animal, that my spirit or soul or whatever is not that of a human. I've never fit in with any crowd, except for the occasional stoner and drunk cliques, but I do not truly identify with any human culture, subculture, or counterculture. I describe myself as a nihilist, however I do not get along with other nihilists for various reasons. I'm sick of being stabbed in the back, hurt, and humiliated by humans. I've been reading a little bit about otherkin, and I will touch more on that topic some other time. Animals and nature are beautiful, I feel they give unconditional love and a sense of welcome which I never get from humans.

Ok, enough of the hippie philosophy for today.

I'm gonna drink some tea and smoke some weed.

Have a good day ^_^

I'm working on my art again

"Untitled," by Antisocial Nihilist

Antisocial Media

I've decided that, with the exception of Youtube and Google Plus, I am no longer using social media. I've deactivated my Facebook for the final time and continue to not use social media. It's a waste of time and honestly my blogs / vlogs take enough of my time. I don't know why I use Facebook anymore, it's just a narcissistic tech addiction that causes more drama than "connecting."

Antisocial Nihilist has spoken.
Tomorrow's blog: Otherkin

Self-Loathing Narcissism

This is a theory I've made on "self-loathing narcissists."

The phrase itself sounds like an oxymoron--how can somebody be obsessed with themselves but also hate themselves? In my definition, a self-loathing narcissist is somebody who hates themselves and hates being alone so much he will do anything to make others like them. He will pretend to fit in, cave in to peer pressure, and will change his personality just so others will think highly of them. They will do selfless things for selfish reasons, such as donate to charity or give money to the homeless, only if others will think highly of them. This is most likely the result of no self esteem, neglect, abuse and rejection suffered all through the S.L.N.'s lifetime.

This is just a psychological theory I've been thinking about.
I am just now waking up and I need some coffee.

I hope everyone had a good 4/20. Stay High ^_^

Happy 4/20!!

Today is one of my favorite holidays, National Pot Smoker Day!!

Today is also Hitler's birthday and the 16th anniversary of Columbine.

Hitler was an avid user of meth, as for Eric and Dylan I'm not sure if they did drugs.

I live in Colorado, and ever since weed has been legalized, this is the place to be for drugs. Drugs are everywhere, especially marijuana, but travelers who come for the ganja usually have other fun drugs.

But today I've decided to quit all drugs EXCEPT weed and caffeine.

I admit I am a problem drinker, even if I'm not a "real alcoholic,"
and I am having a daily struggle to deal with my addiction to meth.
Today, however, is all about weed. No synthetics, no rave drugs, just herb.

Weed is the only good drug. My honest advice? Fuck all drugs except weed.
Check out my other blog, "Misanthrope" for sexy stoner porn ^_^

That is all. Amen. And that is cal.

Heading in a new direction...

I've deactivated both of my Facebook accounts due to personal reasons, I am focusing on my blog for right now, but heading in a new direction.

Follow my other blog, "Misanthrope," for real gore / snuff photos and videos.
It will be a "shock site" much like Bestgore, Efukt and Documenting Reality.

I'm also switching my artistic focus from music and poetry to horror film-making.
Zombie films, serial killer films, etc. My music has always had a strong influence from horror.

http://www.pathetichumanrace.blogspot.com

^^ my official shock site for snuff, porn, gore, horror etc.

Misanthrope

I was stupid to forgive them, I should have known people never change, especially redneck trailer-trash scum such as my parents. I will NEVER forgive anyone again, I am sick of being abused and betrayed. I've realized that people don't fuckin' change; the same person you were five years ago is still the same person you are today. I'm finding the human race to be disgusting, I feel like Earl Sweatshirt right now, I DONT LIKE SHIT AND I DONT GO OUTSIDE. Humans are fuckin' stupid, I'm ashamed to be human.

The Antisocial Nihilist is a misanthrope? Big shocker there, sarcasm intended for the idiots who can somehow read my intellectual posts but probably don't understand a goddamn word coming out of my iconoclastic mouth.

If nobody has told you they hate you today, well guess what?
I FUCKING HATE YOU.